In planning my new term, I have decided in the first week to get my class to write Haikus based on their Christmas holidays. A Haiku is a 3 line poem containing 17 syllables. The line/syllable distribution is a rather wonderfully palendromic 5/7/5. Here is an example I wrote exactly a week ago, on Christmas Eve:
Christmas Eve is here
Tomorrow we open gifts
I simply can't wait.
And here is a Haiku which explores more of the true meaning of this marvellous festival we have just enjoyed:
Jesus came to Earth
Laid in a humble manger
Died to save the world.
My blogging slow down has been due to two main factors:
1) Mountains of planning and preparation for the new term which is at present, 5 days away... yikes!
2) A Nintendo DS which Santa kindly left 'neath the tree for me. I have been training my brain, blowing up rival worms and playing lots of little card and board games against Mr 'CPU' whoever that is? Charles Patrick Utworthy? Cecil Peter Ullington?
Happy New Year to all, see you in 2009!
Wednesday, 31 December 2008
Monday, 22 December 2008
Homeschooling - an interesting debate
Through aimlessly wandering on facebook as a way of avoiding the tedium of medium term lesson planning, I came across this link. I have transcribed it below.
I can't tell if it is serious or a joke, the reasons seem to be a mix.
http://www.scrappleface.com/?p=23
It is an interesting debate, with many friends and families in my church opting to do this. I think my ultimate 'stand' on the subject is that if you choose to do it, that's ok, but don't preach it to others or put others under pressure to do the same.+ Ultimately, I think school is the better option (but as a teacher I recognise that impartiality is not something I can claim).
Anyway, enjoy...
(2002-08-26) — In an effort to increase the public drumbeat for criminalizing homeschooling, California Deputy Superintendent Joanne Mendoza has distributed a memo containing the top 10 reasons why public* schooling is better than homeschooling.
Here is an excerpt from that memo:Why Public* Schooling Is Better Than Homeschooling
Most parents were educated in the underfunded public school system, and so are not smart enough to homeschool their own children.
Children who receive one-on-one homeschooling will learn more than others, giving them an unfair advantage in the marketplace. This is undemocratic.
How can children learn to defend themselves unless they have to fight off bullies on a daily basis?
Ridicule from other children is important to the socialization process.
Children in public* schools can get more practice “Just Saying No” to drugs, cigarettes and alcohol.
Fluorescent lighting may have significant health benefits.
Publicly asking permission to go to the bathroom teaches young people their place in society.
The fashion industry depends upon the peer pressure that only public schools can generate.
Public* schools foster cultural literacy, passing on important traditions like the singing of “Jingle Bells, Batman smells, Robin laid an egg…”
Homeschooled children may not learn important office career skills, like how to sit still for six hours straight.
* For English readers: This article is American. Public School means the same as 'state' school in England. For once, the American definition makes more sense. In England 'Public School' is the same as 'Private School'. What is that about?
+ For those who feel this blog post promotes school education in a way in which I previously said that homeschoolers shouldn't, I apologise.
I can't tell if it is serious or a joke, the reasons seem to be a mix.
http://www.scrappleface.com/?p=23
It is an interesting debate, with many friends and families in my church opting to do this. I think my ultimate 'stand' on the subject is that if you choose to do it, that's ok, but don't preach it to others or put others under pressure to do the same.+ Ultimately, I think school is the better option (but as a teacher I recognise that impartiality is not something I can claim).
Anyway, enjoy...
(2002-08-26) — In an effort to increase the public drumbeat for criminalizing homeschooling, California Deputy Superintendent Joanne Mendoza has distributed a memo containing the top 10 reasons why public* schooling is better than homeschooling.
Here is an excerpt from that memo:Why Public* Schooling Is Better Than Homeschooling
Most parents were educated in the underfunded public school system, and so are not smart enough to homeschool their own children.
Children who receive one-on-one homeschooling will learn more than others, giving them an unfair advantage in the marketplace. This is undemocratic.
How can children learn to defend themselves unless they have to fight off bullies on a daily basis?
Ridicule from other children is important to the socialization process.
Children in public* schools can get more practice “Just Saying No” to drugs, cigarettes and alcohol.
Fluorescent lighting may have significant health benefits.
Publicly asking permission to go to the bathroom teaches young people their place in society.
The fashion industry depends upon the peer pressure that only public schools can generate.
Public* schools foster cultural literacy, passing on important traditions like the singing of “Jingle Bells, Batman smells, Robin laid an egg…”
Homeschooled children may not learn important office career skills, like how to sit still for six hours straight.
* For English readers: This article is American. Public School means the same as 'state' school in England. For once, the American definition makes more sense. In England 'Public School' is the same as 'Private School'. What is that about?
+ For those who feel this blog post promotes school education in a way in which I previously said that homeschoolers shouldn't, I apologise.
Friday, 19 December 2008
..by the skin of my knuckles (aka yet another rant about public transport)
It was the duck's fault.
More specifically, a red duck made of thin bauble-like glass which had decided to break free from it's sellotape shackles below the picture frame.
In my actions of clearing up the broken glass to prevent unaware toes from unexpected pain, I made myself a little later for leaving than I would have liked, but still to stand across the road and see a 49 minutes past sail away at 47 minutes past was annoying.
More annoying, however, was the almost 25 minute wait at the nearby bus stop for a different bus, missing 2 buses out (and then of course 3 came at once oh yes). So it was 6.12. My train to Eastbourne (to get to a dinner with new employment on time) was at 6.32. How was I going to do this?
Much muttering and moaning under my breath later (at people's dithering when getting on and off), the bus did manage to get to st Peter's Church by 6.25 somehow.
I ran up Trafalgar Street, not caring what I looked like, and arrived at the station at 6.27 (either I ran darn quick or our timepieces are not entirely aligned).
For complicated and boring financial reasons, I could not pay by card. I only had a £20 note to buy a ticket with. Those waiting for an amusing description of a £20 note being inserted 48 different ways without success, will be disappointed as it accepted it first time, but it did have no excuse, however, for giving me £12.10 change in 12 x £1 and 1 x 10p coins. Still rushing madly, desperate to catch the train, while retrieving all of my change, I scraped my hand several times on the flappy thing on the change/ticket collection point. As I burst through the barrier and reached my train, I noticed a thin trickle of blood working its way down the back of my right hand.
Still puffing and panting, I fell onto the train, a mess of quite literally blood, sweat and tears.
More specifically, a red duck made of thin bauble-like glass which had decided to break free from it's sellotape shackles below the picture frame.
In my actions of clearing up the broken glass to prevent unaware toes from unexpected pain, I made myself a little later for leaving than I would have liked, but still to stand across the road and see a 49 minutes past sail away at 47 minutes past was annoying.
More annoying, however, was the almost 25 minute wait at the nearby bus stop for a different bus, missing 2 buses out (and then of course 3 came at once oh yes). So it was 6.12. My train to Eastbourne (to get to a dinner with new employment on time) was at 6.32. How was I going to do this?
Much muttering and moaning under my breath later (at people's dithering when getting on and off), the bus did manage to get to st Peter's Church by 6.25 somehow.
I ran up Trafalgar Street, not caring what I looked like, and arrived at the station at 6.27 (either I ran darn quick or our timepieces are not entirely aligned).
For complicated and boring financial reasons, I could not pay by card. I only had a £20 note to buy a ticket with. Those waiting for an amusing description of a £20 note being inserted 48 different ways without success, will be disappointed as it accepted it first time, but it did have no excuse, however, for giving me £12.10 change in 12 x £1 and 1 x 10p coins. Still rushing madly, desperate to catch the train, while retrieving all of my change, I scraped my hand several times on the flappy thing on the change/ticket collection point. As I burst through the barrier and reached my train, I noticed a thin trickle of blood working its way down the back of my right hand.
Still puffing and panting, I fell onto the train, a mess of quite literally blood, sweat and tears.
Monday, 15 December 2008
Scolar ha ha ha ri!
Metro's back page was simply hilarious today: Big Phil talking about suffering from Kidney Stones:
"I am in a lot of pain". Scolari said. "They say it is more pain than when you have a baby but I don't know as I have not had one. It is not possible."
Bet that was devastating news; finding out he couldn't have a baby...
"I am in a lot of pain". Scolari said. "They say it is more pain than when you have a baby but I don't know as I have not had one. It is not possible."
Bet that was devastating news; finding out he couldn't have a baby...
Saturday, 13 December 2008
Perspective...
3 status updates that greeted me on Facebook this morning. Made me think about the different ways people approach Saturday mornings. I have starred out the first two names for privacy reasons.
***** ****** not sure 3 days is long enough to get over a hangover1.5 seconds ago
- Comment
***** ******** is feeling sick, has a horrible headache and is meh.about a minute ago
- Comment
Write a comment...
Tom Blanckensee has been made righteous by the Holy God who alone is righteous.4 minutes ago
***** ****** not sure 3 days is long enough to get over a hangover1.5 seconds ago
- Comment
***** ******** is feeling sick, has a horrible headache and is meh.about a minute ago
- Comment
Write a comment...
Tom Blanckensee has been made righteous by the Holy God who alone is righteous.4 minutes ago
Friday, 12 December 2008
Yet another farewell...
I finished work at Olivet today, and it was very emotional as I said goodbye to students, some of whom I have been teaching for the past 11 weeks. Although I have an exciting (and scary) new job, I will miss this time. This Autumn has been a brilliant time.
As part of the afternoon Christmas Party, students of different nationalities shared with everyone how to say 'Merry Christmas' in their language.
German - Frohe Weihnachten!
French - Joyeux Noel!
Italian - Natale allegro!
and my personal favourite...
Japanese - Melly Chlistmas!
As part of the afternoon Christmas Party, students of different nationalities shared with everyone how to say 'Merry Christmas' in their language.
German - Frohe Weihnachten!
French - Joyeux Noel!
Italian - Natale allegro!
and my personal favourite...
Japanese - Melly Chlistmas!
Monday, 8 December 2008
Very Amusing Turmoil...
I was in Eastbourne today after gaining an idea of how feasible bussing it to work will be after Christmas - early signs discouraging, but anyway.... I found myself walking past Primark, and as I spent 4 years working there part time while studying, I always find a natural curiousity about other branches.
On first impressions, it looked the same - gondolas (I know they are boats in Venice - don't start me) full of messed up clothes, the same wheelie tables with a pile of rubbish on the little tray underneath, (50% staff junk and 50% litter cheekily dumped by the public). The look of boredom and hopelessness on the face of a jumper refolder-er as she realises it is 1 step forward and 5 steps back...
... but wait... something incredibly surprising and unusual is evident...
Let me explain. You know the deal with "....99p?" You know, where £1.99 sounds cheaper than £2.o0. Well it works, even when you know what they're doing.
Well Primark have never bothered with this, seeing as the stuff is dirt cheap anyway.
Let's be open, honest. It's 2 quid! Wow.
The real reason they do this? No faffing around with coppers, giving pennies in change. Transactions move quicker, customers through quicker, more money made, faster queues and happier customers. Also means no complex maths skills needed...
But alas this system has been ripped apart by Mr Brown's VAT antics as there are lots of individual signs displayed around the store for £4.76 £1.96 etc etc
(Prices loosely based on author's memory and intended only to make the point).
Made me chuckle anyway...
On first impressions, it looked the same - gondolas (I know they are boats in Venice - don't start me) full of messed up clothes, the same wheelie tables with a pile of rubbish on the little tray underneath, (50% staff junk and 50% litter cheekily dumped by the public). The look of boredom and hopelessness on the face of a jumper refolder-er as she realises it is 1 step forward and 5 steps back...
... but wait... something incredibly surprising and unusual is evident...
Let me explain. You know the deal with "....99p?" You know, where £1.99 sounds cheaper than £2.o0. Well it works, even when you know what they're doing.
Well Primark have never bothered with this, seeing as the stuff is dirt cheap anyway.
Let's be open, honest. It's 2 quid! Wow.
The real reason they do this? No faffing around with coppers, giving pennies in change. Transactions move quicker, customers through quicker, more money made, faster queues and happier customers. Also means no complex maths skills needed...
But alas this system has been ripped apart by Mr Brown's VAT antics as there are lots of individual signs displayed around the store for £4.76 £1.96 etc etc
(Prices loosely based on author's memory and intended only to make the point).
Made me chuckle anyway...
Wednesday, 3 December 2008
Tuesday, 2 December 2008
Sleeping buddies
For the last few nights, I have found an increasing number of random things in my bed, probably a result of sorting out lots of rubbish in my room.
Last night I found (in no particular order): a sandwich box, my bible, a conker and a Comic Relief 'Tomato' Car Nose from whatever early 90s year that was.
I left them there; they weren't doing me any harm huddled in the corner. There's room in a double bed for all of us.
Last night I found (in no particular order): a sandwich box, my bible, a conker and a Comic Relief 'Tomato' Car Nose from whatever early 90s year that was.
I left them there; they weren't doing me any harm huddled in the corner. There's room in a double bed for all of us.
Friday, 28 November 2008
Faithful
God is so faithful.
That's all.
Well, I had better explain.
3 and a half years ago, after an enjoyable but difficult first few months in teaching, I left my job, hoping God would direct me. That he did, and I loved being a supply teacher, but he took me up a few blind alleys on the way. I know these alleys had a purpose, and I have had the wonderful luxury of not working every day, allowing me to run a Cub Pack for the last 3 years, and be very involved with Children's work at church too.
I felt God saying stick with teaching. When I decided to quit after a horrible day early on in my supply tenure, Phatfish' song 'Stepping Out' played next on my stereo.
'We're on a journey of faith, sometimes the way ahead is clear, some times it's clouded, but promises are spoken'.
Your path ahead is mapped out. Will you choose to trust him, or choose to not, are you ready to believe?
He knows you, He made you, He loves you and knows what's best.
I could go on. God has been so faithful, even when 'dream' jobs didn't happen, even when interviews went sour. But I can say today, He has led me to this point. A new job in Eastbourne starting in January. People I have had to go to and say 'You know that thing I help you with / run every week? I can't do that for the next 7 months at least, and they have said 'Fine'.
God makes all paths straight.
The next challenge lies ahead. A very nice school, bright pupils. It's gonna be a slog. But hey! God is faithful!!!
That's all.
Well, I had better explain.
3 and a half years ago, after an enjoyable but difficult first few months in teaching, I left my job, hoping God would direct me. That he did, and I loved being a supply teacher, but he took me up a few blind alleys on the way. I know these alleys had a purpose, and I have had the wonderful luxury of not working every day, allowing me to run a Cub Pack for the last 3 years, and be very involved with Children's work at church too.
I felt God saying stick with teaching. When I decided to quit after a horrible day early on in my supply tenure, Phatfish' song 'Stepping Out' played next on my stereo.
'We're on a journey of faith, sometimes the way ahead is clear, some times it's clouded, but promises are spoken'.
Your path ahead is mapped out. Will you choose to trust him, or choose to not, are you ready to believe?
He knows you, He made you, He loves you and knows what's best.
I could go on. God has been so faithful, even when 'dream' jobs didn't happen, even when interviews went sour. But I can say today, He has led me to this point. A new job in Eastbourne starting in January. People I have had to go to and say 'You know that thing I help you with / run every week? I can't do that for the next 7 months at least, and they have said 'Fine'.
God makes all paths straight.
The next challenge lies ahead. A very nice school, bright pupils. It's gonna be a slog. But hey! God is faithful!!!
Wednesday, 26 November 2008
Exactly what it says on the tin.
"All known metal bands" the predictably black cover pronounced. I see that Waterstones have kindly provided a handwritten staff review below, you know, to just show that they are not just a faceless corporate chain, oh no, they allow staff opinions to be aired. This opinion really augmented what I felt might be a slightly narrow focus to this publication. In scrawled student-y writing on a small card below it said:
'The names of all known metal bands!!"
The !! seemed a slight attempt at a knowing look in some form of irony.
I opened the book, and indeed, it was simply a list of all the metal bands that 'Dan Nelson' was aware of in 2007.
Each black page inscripted with long lists of names in tiny silver print, making it almost impossible to read.
I want to meet the person who would buy that. Then again, maybe I don't.
'The names of all known metal bands!!"
The !! seemed a slight attempt at a knowing look in some form of irony.
I opened the book, and indeed, it was simply a list of all the metal bands that 'Dan Nelson' was aware of in 2007.
Each black page inscripted with long lists of names in tiny silver print, making it almost impossible to read.
I want to meet the person who would buy that. Then again, maybe I don't.
Sunday, 19 October 2008
A visit to the Library
I visited the Library the other day,
The smart newly built Library in town.
Magnificent building all made of glass,
But inside the shelves look tatty;
Like they’re temporary; waiting for new shelves,
But I don’t think they are.
There are computers everywhere.
Some to work on,
Some to tell you stuff like how many books you have,
When to bring them back,
And – in my case, how much your fines come to.
Sometimes they let you off the fines.
If no-one else is waiting for the book
Or it doesn’t come to very much.
Last year I forgot a book
Left it under my bed
And I got a big fine.
Won’t do that again.
I find the computer that helps me find the book I want.
It isn’t very helpful.
Ah – Three Copies in
None reserved.
Excellent.
Go to shelf – nowhere in sight.
All the books are out of order, so I end up checking every one.
Twice.
Surely there’s no way that three people took the same book out in the time it took me to get from the computer to the shelf?
Hmmm.
Another visit to the computer
And I notice a ‘More info’ button
Which tells me exactly where the three books have got to.
One is out?
But, none reserved!
Oh reserved. Silly me.
So some one has it, but no one is waiting for it.
Ok.
And the other two?
Miles away in other Libraries the other side of town.
What’s the point in telling me what other Libraries have?
I want to know what I can get here.
One of the Libraries isn’t too far,
And I can get there on one bus,
So I decide to go.
First of all, I need to take out 2 other books I have.
You don’t need to speak to anyone,
It’s amazing.
No wonder people don’t talk to each other nowadays.
All computers’ fault.
I put my books neatly together
On the shelf in front of the screen
And swipe my card.
This is where the fun begins.
Forwards,
Backwards,
Upside down forwards,
Upside down backwards.
S l o w l y
Quickly
I must look a right idiot,
I’m glad there’s no one behind me.
They’d be tapping their feet,
Making impatient noises by now.
After the computer gives up on me twice
Because it thinks there is no one there
It works.
Suddenly.
And the full details of the books
Appear on the screen.
Magic.
Can someone please explain how they do that?
‘Magnets and lasers and stuff’
One of my friends explained vaguely
When I expressed this amazement to them.
I get on the bus and go to the other Library.
Despite being refurbished
This Library still has that proper Library smell
Like old schools
Where Stern divorced female teachers in their fifties
With a chip on their shoulder
(Probably about ‘men’)
Look over their glasses and
Bark at children all day long.
I find the book
Eventually.
Here they have better card scanners
Like in shops
Where you pass the card underneath.
One second
Beep
Done
They should get those at the other Library.
The smart newly built Library in town.
Magnificent building all made of glass,
But inside the shelves look tatty;
Like they’re temporary; waiting for new shelves,
But I don’t think they are.
There are computers everywhere.
Some to work on,
Some to tell you stuff like how many books you have,
When to bring them back,
And – in my case, how much your fines come to.
Sometimes they let you off the fines.
If no-one else is waiting for the book
Or it doesn’t come to very much.
Last year I forgot a book
Left it under my bed
And I got a big fine.
Won’t do that again.
I find the computer that helps me find the book I want.
It isn’t very helpful.
Ah – Three Copies in
None reserved.
Excellent.
Go to shelf – nowhere in sight.
All the books are out of order, so I end up checking every one.
Twice.
Surely there’s no way that three people took the same book out in the time it took me to get from the computer to the shelf?
Hmmm.
Another visit to the computer
And I notice a ‘More info’ button
Which tells me exactly where the three books have got to.
One is out?
But, none reserved!
Oh reserved. Silly me.
So some one has it, but no one is waiting for it.
Ok.
And the other two?
Miles away in other Libraries the other side of town.
What’s the point in telling me what other Libraries have?
I want to know what I can get here.
One of the Libraries isn’t too far,
And I can get there on one bus,
So I decide to go.
First of all, I need to take out 2 other books I have.
You don’t need to speak to anyone,
It’s amazing.
No wonder people don’t talk to each other nowadays.
All computers’ fault.
I put my books neatly together
On the shelf in front of the screen
And swipe my card.
This is where the fun begins.
Forwards,
Backwards,
Upside down forwards,
Upside down backwards.
S l o w l y
Quickly
I must look a right idiot,
I’m glad there’s no one behind me.
They’d be tapping their feet,
Making impatient noises by now.
After the computer gives up on me twice
Because it thinks there is no one there
It works.
Suddenly.
And the full details of the books
Appear on the screen.
Magic.
Can someone please explain how they do that?
‘Magnets and lasers and stuff’
One of my friends explained vaguely
When I expressed this amazement to them.
I get on the bus and go to the other Library.
Despite being refurbished
This Library still has that proper Library smell
Like old schools
Where Stern divorced female teachers in their fifties
With a chip on their shoulder
(Probably about ‘men’)
Look over their glasses and
Bark at children all day long.
I find the book
Eventually.
Here they have better card scanners
Like in shops
Where you pass the card underneath.
One second
Beep
Done
They should get those at the other Library.
Wednesday, 15 October 2008
"Penny for the Guy"
This was the cry from the scruffy little urchins outside Videostar Video Shop, Queen's Park Road. Their attempt at a"guy" was pathetic compared to the guys I have made with proper clothes and newspaper and effort. I'm sorry, but a bin liner with a balloon stuck on the top makes for a pretty anorexic and pathetic-looking Guy. Maybe he was on hunger strike, I don't know.
Anyway, I ignored them as usual and entered the shop. As I walked to the door, an idea struck me. I looked through my change, and there was one shining with the gleam of possibility.
"Penny for the Guy" they repeated as I left the shop.
So I gave them one. Their immediate surprise and excitement was immediately followed by the inevitable groan of disappointment.
Why were they complaining? I wondered to myself. After all, I gave them exactly what they asked for.
Anyway, I ignored them as usual and entered the shop. As I walked to the door, an idea struck me. I looked through my change, and there was one shining with the gleam of possibility.
"Penny for the Guy" they repeated as I left the shop.
So I gave them one. Their immediate surprise and excitement was immediately followed by the inevitable groan of disappointment.
Why were they complaining? I wondered to myself. After all, I gave them exactly what they asked for.
Tuesday, 7 October 2008
Japanese banking crisis
Alas, not my own work, but still worth sharing...
BANK PROBLEMS IN JAPAN
Following the problems in the sub-prime lending market in America and the run on Northern Rock in the UK, uncertainty has now hit Japan. In the last 7 hours Origami Bank has folded, Sumo bank has gone belly up and Bonsai bank announced plans to cut back the number of branches.
Yesterday, it was announced that Karaoke Bank is up for sale, and will likely go for a song, while today, shares in Kamikaze Bank were suspended after they nose-dived.
Samurai bank is soldiering on following sharp cutbacks, Ninja bank is reported to have taken a hit, but they remain in the black. Furthermore, 500 staff at Karate bank got the chop and analysts report that there is something fishy going on at Sushi bank, where it is feared that staff may get a raw deal.
BANK PROBLEMS IN JAPAN
Following the problems in the sub-prime lending market in America and the run on Northern Rock in the UK, uncertainty has now hit Japan. In the last 7 hours Origami Bank has folded, Sumo bank has gone belly up and Bonsai bank announced plans to cut back the number of branches.
Yesterday, it was announced that Karaoke Bank is up for sale, and will likely go for a song, while today, shares in Kamikaze Bank were suspended after they nose-dived.
Samurai bank is soldiering on following sharp cutbacks, Ninja bank is reported to have taken a hit, but they remain in the black. Furthermore, 500 staff at Karate bank got the chop and analysts report that there is something fishy going on at Sushi bank, where it is feared that staff may get a raw deal.
Monday, 29 September 2008
Tabloid Masquerade
Frown Daily
Scream Daily
Be brain-washed Daily
Feel Apathy Daily
Pre-judge Daily
Dictate Daily
Withdraw Daily
Have Nightmares Daily
Encourage Ignorance Daily
Feel nothing Daily
Make ill-informed judgements Daily
Voice sympathy for facism Daily
Support the BNP Daily
Suspend rational thought Daily
Shock Yourself Daily
Victory!
Conker competition co-organised by my good self went very well yesterday.
Oh yeah and WE WON!!!
Considering two of our team didn't know how to play until about 3 hours before the tournament, it was pretty incredible!
6th Brighton, the Brighton District Cubs Conker Champions 2oo8!
Oh yeah and WE WON!!!
Considering two of our team didn't know how to play until about 3 hours before the tournament, it was pretty incredible!
6th Brighton, the Brighton District Cubs Conker Champions 2oo8!
Wednesday, 24 September 2008
Poor vs Rich. Poor wins!
Brighton 2-2 Man City (5-3 pens)
Manchester City suffered an embarrassing Carling Cup exit after being beaten on penalties by Brighton.
Enough said! What a night! No result this season will top this one!
The richest club in the world beaten deservedly by one of the poorest. Capitalism is the way of the foolish man!
Manchester City suffered an embarrassing Carling Cup exit after being beaten on penalties by Brighton.
Enough said! What a night! No result this season will top this one!
The richest club in the world beaten deservedly by one of the poorest. Capitalism is the way of the foolish man!
Tribute: There is nothing worse than...
For one night only... a tribute to another blog.
Yesterday I left you with the false impression that 'I have nothing going on'. This is never true for me, I should have made the slight alteration of adding 'of interest' in between 'nothing' and 'going on'.
Today I went and taught deaf teenagers. Aha I thought! This will produce enough fodder for a mighty fine blog, with many amusing anecdotes (mocking me more than anything else).
Actually the day was rather bland and dull, being left with about an hours worth of work for 5 hours was a little stressful, but with some impromptu role-play I just about fleshed it out. Actually two of the students also had a limited command of the English language too, so it was like two of my worlds rolled into one... Luckily one other student was easily understandable so a lot went through him.
Anyway, I am distracted. My journey there was eventful only as my keen desire not to overshoot the bus stop led to me undershooting it by two stops. Two stops very far apart.
So the No52 bus which I ruled out catching as 'it gets me there at 8.55 which is 25 minutes later than i need to' merrily drove past me as I approached shortly before my rather confused friend Sarah drove the other way fresh from dropping her child at school. I arrived, slightly damp from spitty rain, at 9am.
The way home was even more eventful. My thought processes as I approached my bus stop on thr coast road after already walking 15 minutes:
"Oh there's a police car by my stop. I wonder what it is doing?"
Upon closer inspection as I drew nearer...
"Oh, that police car is blocking the road so my bus can't get through. I wonder why. How am I going to get home?"
Upon speaking to nice friendly policeman:
"Ok, I'm walking back to Brighton then".
10 minutes later, the reason for my unscheduled bout of exercise and sea air... a rather mangled sports car/bus combination. Let's pray there were no fatalities.
Eventually, I reached Brighton (1 hour later) and caught my bus from the old steine. Thoroughly tired, at the end of my bus journey I descended the stairs to find the bottom deck liberally coated with human vomit.
Nice touch.
Yesterday I left you with the false impression that 'I have nothing going on'. This is never true for me, I should have made the slight alteration of adding 'of interest' in between 'nothing' and 'going on'.
Today I went and taught deaf teenagers. Aha I thought! This will produce enough fodder for a mighty fine blog, with many amusing anecdotes (mocking me more than anything else).
Actually the day was rather bland and dull, being left with about an hours worth of work for 5 hours was a little stressful, but with some impromptu role-play I just about fleshed it out. Actually two of the students also had a limited command of the English language too, so it was like two of my worlds rolled into one... Luckily one other student was easily understandable so a lot went through him.
Anyway, I am distracted. My journey there was eventful only as my keen desire not to overshoot the bus stop led to me undershooting it by two stops. Two stops very far apart.
So the No52 bus which I ruled out catching as 'it gets me there at 8.55 which is 25 minutes later than i need to' merrily drove past me as I approached shortly before my rather confused friend Sarah drove the other way fresh from dropping her child at school. I arrived, slightly damp from spitty rain, at 9am.
The way home was even more eventful. My thought processes as I approached my bus stop on thr coast road after already walking 15 minutes:
"Oh there's a police car by my stop. I wonder what it is doing?"
Upon closer inspection as I drew nearer...
"Oh, that police car is blocking the road so my bus can't get through. I wonder why. How am I going to get home?"
Upon speaking to nice friendly policeman:
"Ok, I'm walking back to Brighton then".
10 minutes later, the reason for my unscheduled bout of exercise and sea air... a rather mangled sports car/bus combination. Let's pray there were no fatalities.
Eventually, I reached Brighton (1 hour later) and caught my bus from the old steine. Thoroughly tired, at the end of my bus journey I descended the stairs to find the bottom deck liberally coated with human vomit.
Nice touch.
Tuesday, 23 September 2008
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23 September 2008 04:57
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23 September 2008 04:58
Why? This is frustrating. I want to know what this person said, on 2 rapidly successive occasions that they so instantly found inexplicably unpublishable?
The worst thing is, I don't know who it is! I have my suspicions (I have, to my knowledge only 2 readers, maybe 3), but naming them 'the author' awards them a status of anonymity I don't think they deserve.
As you might be able to tell, I haven't got a lot going on at the moment, but tomorrow I'm spending the day teaching deaf teenagers so I'm sure my life will take a more interesting turn very soon.
This post has been removed by the author.
23 September 2008 04:57
Comment deleted
This post has been removed by the author.
23 September 2008 04:58
Why? This is frustrating. I want to know what this person said, on 2 rapidly successive occasions that they so instantly found inexplicably unpublishable?
The worst thing is, I don't know who it is! I have my suspicions (I have, to my knowledge only 2 readers, maybe 3), but naming them 'the author' awards them a status of anonymity I don't think they deserve.
As you might be able to tell, I haven't got a lot going on at the moment, but tomorrow I'm spending the day teaching deaf teenagers so I'm sure my life will take a more interesting turn very soon.
Thursday, 18 September 2008
Conkered!
Does anyone know the best way of stringing a conker?
I'm co-running a conker competition in 10 days time, and have to find and string a fair few of the blighters fairly soon. Suggestions welcome...
Wednesday, 17 September 2008
Writer's Blog
I am unable to post today after reading the brilliance of the post dated Sunday 14th September on here
Monday, 15 September 2008
Prepositioned!
Why is it so hard to explain prepositions in the English Language? My poor Turkish students (who have never heard of such a strange phenomena) really struggled...
"I have confidence about his ability?"
(No, that would be ...in his ability.)
"It wasn't an accident. He did it for purpose?"
(No, unfortunately ...on purpose.)
"Bill's absolutely terrified from spiders?"
(No, he's terrified of them).
etc etc
In better news. 5 bars of Dairy Milk for £1.00 in Messrs Frank Winfield Woolworth. Lovely stuff!
"I have confidence about his ability?"
(No, that would be ...in his ability.)
"It wasn't an accident. He did it for purpose?"
(No, unfortunately ...on purpose.)
"Bill's absolutely terrified from spiders?"
(No, he's terrified of them).
etc etc
In better news. 5 bars of Dairy Milk for £1.00 in Messrs Frank Winfield Woolworth. Lovely stuff!
Saturday, 13 September 2008
Fingers in your ears... 3...2...1..... er....
The arrogance of scientists still astounds me. No, we aren't all going to be sucked into oblivion. Thankfully we do not have a driver who's asleep behind the wheel, and personally the whole thing stinks of Babel, (see Genesis 11) just as much as this gene meddling and modifying we're doing.
This week has been unspeakably busy, but a lot of fun. I have been teaching students English and some of the classes have been up for a laugh. We ate chocolate, pretended to make sandwiches, tried to lick our elbows and two students even did handstands.
Proper football returns today after 2 weeks dominated by reading mere headlines while greedy Setanta ruins all the fun. Anyway, football focus is on in a minute so hopefully I'll see the goals in something better than the grainy Croatian TV coverage available on YouTube.
See here for an extremely coherant rant on this topic
They're making life more difficult for those of us with only 4 channels (why do I need any more??)
This week has been unspeakably busy, but a lot of fun. I have been teaching students English and some of the classes have been up for a laugh. We ate chocolate, pretended to make sandwiches, tried to lick our elbows and two students even did handstands.
Proper football returns today after 2 weeks dominated by reading mere headlines while greedy Setanta ruins all the fun. Anyway, football focus is on in a minute so hopefully I'll see the goals in something better than the grainy Croatian TV coverage available on YouTube.
See here for an extremely coherant rant on this topic
They're making life more difficult for those of us with only 4 channels (why do I need any more??)
Wednesday, 10 September 2008
Grrrr
Setanta. Grrr. Not having National Team Highllights on a terrestrial station is immoral and goes against the values of Public service Broadcasting. Who's with me?
Monday, 8 September 2008
Friday, 5 September 2008
Jolly Jobsworths...
My daily commute to central Brighton and my temporary position of employ involves a rather enjoyable daily read of the METRO (sexual?) free newspaper. However, an annoying common theme seems to have emerged towards the end of the week. After yesterday's front page story about a 24 year old mother-of-two denied a smear test despite a clear family history of cancer, today's Metro contains no less than 4 counts of what I would call 'Jobsworth-ing':
1. 13 year old boy's cat goes missing. As any normal boy would do, he puts up 'missing' posters. Threatened with ASBO and an £80 fine.
2. Soldier on sick leave from Afghanistan forced to sleep in his car in Surrey after Hotel wouldn't give him a room as 'they don't accept military personnel'.
3.Mother rings M&S to complain about 7 year old son's Superman suit. Told to pass phone to said 7 year old so they can either speak to him or get his permission to speak to her. Something to do with the data protection act apparently.
4. Essex police told to remove sunglasses as they intimidate people.
Ok, the last one is a bit more tenuous and possibly understandable.
Favourite METRO headlines of the last few days...
Keegan resigns. No, really, he does.
Sex slur hits 'Pitbull'.
Drug addict elephant is let out of rehab.
Hello Doctor... I've not been well since I died.
New fears over confidence dip.
Jobcentre threw me out for feeding baby (and no I wasn't breastfeeding.)
(Sorry, this actually belongs in the jobsworth section)
Looney Toons
and last but not least...
Inflatable dentist to save our teeth.
1. 13 year old boy's cat goes missing. As any normal boy would do, he puts up 'missing' posters. Threatened with ASBO and an £80 fine.
2. Soldier on sick leave from Afghanistan forced to sleep in his car in Surrey after Hotel wouldn't give him a room as 'they don't accept military personnel'.
3.Mother rings M&S to complain about 7 year old son's Superman suit. Told to pass phone to said 7 year old so they can either speak to him or get his permission to speak to her. Something to do with the data protection act apparently.
4. Essex police told to remove sunglasses as they intimidate people.
Ok, the last one is a bit more tenuous and possibly understandable.
Favourite METRO headlines of the last few days...
Keegan resigns. No, really, he does.
Sex slur hits 'Pitbull'.
Drug addict elephant is let out of rehab.
Hello Doctor... I've not been well since I died.
New fears over confidence dip.
Jobcentre threw me out for feeding baby (and no I wasn't breastfeeding.)
(Sorry, this actually belongs in the jobsworth section)
Looney Toons
and last but not least...
Inflatable dentist to save our teeth.
Wednesday, 3 September 2008
It's a rich man's world...
I have been pondering the rather ugly side of money this week as the football season gets into full swing, and the hideousness of the end of the 'transfer window' (a period of time in which players can be bought and sold between clubs), which ended on Monday at Midnight. Clubs holding out to get the most money, other clubs trying to pay as little as possible. And, despite being a passionate football fan, it still angers me that players can wait for a "better offer", when they earn something like £120,000 a week and want £140,000. Footballers aren't worth it, but unfortunately, this side of the game is here to stay.
And create an elite it has, with the "top 4" likely to stay there. (Arsenal, Chelsea, Liverpool and Manchester United to put them in alphabetical order). However, Manchester City's recent move from one dodgy owner to another, sees them promise offers like £135m for players worth much MUCH less, just to become "the biggest club in the world". Money no object? Rather dull I think. Bit like stealing the bank in Monopoly. NO fun for anyone.
The events in Shropshire have just left me speechless, the apparent desperation of a man who fell foul to the love of wealth. Just an unthinkable event that you can't imagine being real.
I was listening to a Pulp song last night; and while its tone is a bit more unkind and angry than I would take, it makes a solid point:
Check your lucky numbers.
That much money could drag you under, oh.
What's the point of being rich?
If you can't think what to do with it?
'Cause your so bleedin' thick.
Oh we weren't supposed to be,
We learnt too much at school
Now we can't help but see
That the future that you've got mapped out
Is nothing much to shout about....
Cocker/Banks/Mackey/Senior/Doyle/Webber
(Taken from 'Mis-shapes' on 'Different Class', 1995 Island Recordings.
On a cheerier note, I saw Zoé Ball in Western Road the other day and was so distracted by her and the man singing show tunes badly into a tinny PA system, that I almost joined Amnesty International.
And create an elite it has, with the "top 4" likely to stay there. (Arsenal, Chelsea, Liverpool and Manchester United to put them in alphabetical order). However, Manchester City's recent move from one dodgy owner to another, sees them promise offers like £135m for players worth much MUCH less, just to become "the biggest club in the world". Money no object? Rather dull I think. Bit like stealing the bank in Monopoly. NO fun for anyone.
The events in Shropshire have just left me speechless, the apparent desperation of a man who fell foul to the love of wealth. Just an unthinkable event that you can't imagine being real.
I was listening to a Pulp song last night; and while its tone is a bit more unkind and angry than I would take, it makes a solid point:
Check your lucky numbers.
That much money could drag you under, oh.
What's the point of being rich?
If you can't think what to do with it?
'Cause your so bleedin' thick.
Oh we weren't supposed to be,
We learnt too much at school
Now we can't help but see
That the future that you've got mapped out
Is nothing much to shout about....
Cocker/Banks/Mackey/Senior/Doyle/Webber
(Taken from 'Mis-shapes' on 'Different Class', 1995 Island Recordings.
On a cheerier note, I saw Zoé Ball in Western Road the other day and was so distracted by her and the man singing show tunes badly into a tinny PA system, that I almost joined Amnesty International.
Tuesday, 26 August 2008
"It's the freakiest show"
All recent attempts to reignite my once insatiable appetite for blogging have failed, but I am determined to make this one work.
Last night I ventured to a local drinking hole to celebrate (?) the departure of somebody I have considered a friend for the best part of 18 months. He's a very friendly and generous chap, and plus he has an amusing Northern Irish accent which causes him to say many things in an amusing and mockable way.
Anyway, upon arrival at the said establishment, I discovered to my horror that it was a 'karaoke night'.
Now I must explain. I am 27 years old and I have never undertaken Karaoke. Why? Because I'm a music snob. If I were to be invited to deposit some items into Room 101, I would obviously put marmite, celery, lager, Richard Madeley and Birmingham City Football Club straight in. However, I would also put in karaoke.
Let's consider this from a balanced perspective:
1)It's just a bit of fun. People enjoy it, the point is to sing badly, but it gives everyone who has no hope of performing in any context a chance to sing a song they like and amuse their friends and anyone else who happens to be in the room.
2) It is the lowest form of music, it promotes mediocrity, and is often accompanied by irresponsible drinking. Plus the selection of songs are so predictable and tasteless (13,000 Abba sings, no I didn't know there were that many either)... NO Divine Comedy. I would have expected a bit of National Express action as a token acknowledgement at least,
Anyway, in my pride, I have never undertaken karaoke, but last night I started to melt. I realised that my boycott of karaoke was doing nothing to halt its inevitable popularity, and in fact my participation may at least introduce a room full of people to something known in my voacbulary as a 'decent song'. If you can't beat 'em.... My pride had to be dealt with. I felt the increasing urge to 'have a go'.
So I did.
Even I was quite impressed how long I could sustain a fully tuneful 'MAAAARRRRS' at the end of the chorus, and my knowledge of the lyrics to the second verse proved useful when the words machine broke:
"It's on Amerika's (sic) tortured brow / Mickey Mouse has grown up a cow....
God bless Bowie....
Last night I ventured to a local drinking hole to celebrate (?) the departure of somebody I have considered a friend for the best part of 18 months. He's a very friendly and generous chap, and plus he has an amusing Northern Irish accent which causes him to say many things in an amusing and mockable way.
Anyway, upon arrival at the said establishment, I discovered to my horror that it was a 'karaoke night'.
Now I must explain. I am 27 years old and I have never undertaken Karaoke. Why? Because I'm a music snob. If I were to be invited to deposit some items into Room 101, I would obviously put marmite, celery, lager, Richard Madeley and Birmingham City Football Club straight in. However, I would also put in karaoke.
Let's consider this from a balanced perspective:
1)It's just a bit of fun. People enjoy it, the point is to sing badly, but it gives everyone who has no hope of performing in any context a chance to sing a song they like and amuse their friends and anyone else who happens to be in the room.
2) It is the lowest form of music, it promotes mediocrity, and is often accompanied by irresponsible drinking. Plus the selection of songs are so predictable and tasteless (13,000 Abba sings, no I didn't know there were that many either)... NO Divine Comedy. I would have expected a bit of National Express action as a token acknowledgement at least,
Anyway, in my pride, I have never undertaken karaoke, but last night I started to melt. I realised that my boycott of karaoke was doing nothing to halt its inevitable popularity, and in fact my participation may at least introduce a room full of people to something known in my voacbulary as a 'decent song'. If you can't beat 'em.... My pride had to be dealt with. I felt the increasing urge to 'have a go'.
So I did.
Even I was quite impressed how long I could sustain a fully tuneful 'MAAAARRRRS' at the end of the chorus, and my knowledge of the lyrics to the second verse proved useful when the words machine broke:
"It's on Amerika's (sic) tortured brow / Mickey Mouse has grown up a cow....
God bless Bowie....
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